2016-2017: Week 1 Player Reports

9:00 - Team Garmes (Blue) vs. Team Guinane (Light Blue)

-It’s going to be an exciting year of HatchetBall, as the draft finally dispersed the players in a way that might bring some excitement through parity, but in Week 1, there was nothing new to see. Mark, Matt, and Luke are together this year, and looked strong as a unit, even if the entire team took most of the first half to wake up against a bottom-feeder Luke-A-Like squad. On paper and on the court in Week 1, the obvious weakness for Team Blue Balls is depth. Past a few key contributors, it’s hard to imagine where any production will come from. But their front line is the most diverse in HatchetBall, giving them scoring, defense, rebounding, and the ability to matchup against any lineup. Don’t sleep on alien-arms Mittermann, either. Eric looked strong in Week 1, throwing in a couple jumpers (!!!!!) and grabbing 6 boards. He’s not going to light up your loins on the stat sheet, but with a bit of athleticism and paired with a high-quality foursome in Mark, Matt, Luke, and Garmes, that could be the squad on the floor in key moments throughout the season.

10:00 - Team Beave (Grey) vs. Team Vito (Orange)

-It’s easy to jump to conclusions and get carried away on draft night. But nothing truly matters until the team shows up and the ball is in play. One would have thought Team Vito would have run away with this one, out-matching Team Beave in scoring and athleticism, but this game was close all the way until the last few minutes when it opened up a bit. That could speak to the quality of Team Beave, which certainly has the depth Team Blue is lacking. However, the death of this team will be a lack of playmakers. It doesn’t work if all five players are waiting around on the perimeter for someone else to make something happen. Troy shot well for them (22 points) and Steve mixed it up a bit inside (11 rebounds), but they’ll need standout performances from 2-3 players every week to keep up with the top-tier teams. Team Orange has the firepower needed to contend for a championship. Rob’s shot was falling in Week 1 (36 points and 6 Three-Pointers) and Jerry was back on the court with his usual rodent tricks. Coach Vito added some depth to this roster as well, which could be critical in an eventual showdown with Team Garmes.

11:00 - Team Tierney (Dark Blue) vs. Team Brennan (Red)

-Tierney is a turd. I can’t believe I thought his team won a game.

Standings

Team	Captain	Win	Loss	Record	Win %	Streak
Dark Blue	Tierney	1	0	1 - 0	1.000	W1
Orange	Vito	1	0	1 - 0	1.000	W1
Blue	Garmes	1	0	1 - 0	1.000	W1
Light Blue	Guinane	0	1	0 - 1	0.000	L1
Red	Brennan	0	1	0 - 1	0.000	L1
Grey	Beave	0	1	0 - 1	0.000	L1
Yellow	Bo	0	0	0 - 0	0.000
Green	Matt V	0	0	0 - 0	0.000