Week Five Player Reports
Mark Koll: While this is certainly an
exciting time for Mark is his personal life, becoming a father and about to
become a home owner, this appears to be a new low in his HatchetBall
career. While his numbers haven't
suffered (and are actually up in most areas), his team is a mess. Team
What's Next: Team
Mark Koll
2015-2016 Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
32.25 |
8.25 |
3.00 |
1.50 |
95.65% |
Matt Koll: Matt Koll
will need to play one his best seasons ever if Team Orange is going to topple
any of the better teams in HatchetBall. In order to do this, he'll have to do a good
job of adapting to the matchups any given week may
bring. In Week Five, Team Blue was
resolute that they weren't going to let Mark beat them. Their defensive focus was solely directed at
Mark, leaving Matt Koll and company for some very
clean looks at the rim. Matt responded
well, scoring a season-high 15 points and adding 12 rebounds and 6
assists. However, these numbers weren't
enough. Matt needs to look to penetrate
more often and try to crash the offensive boards a bit more; these should be
vulnerabilities of opposing defenses, as they are cheating so far towards
wherever Mark is on the court. Matt
needs to take advantage. Other people
need to step up too, but Matt Koll remaining a
consistent threat on the offensive end is the best way for
What's Next: Matt should easily grab 20 rebounds against the slow and weak Team Red; let's see that athletic fire on display.
Matt Koll
2015-2016 Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
6.50 |
8.75 |
6.25 |
2.50 |
25.00% |
Matt Vitaliano: Matt's boys continue to
live up to expectations, trouncing Team Red in Week Five. Other than Rob, Matt has gathered a roster
that likes to run and share the ball.
Matt doesn't do much on the court these days (not that he ever did), but
his team hasn't really needed him yet. You'd
have to think they'll need his shooting more once they face a team that can
adequately guard Steve and Rob, so we'll see how this brittle old octogenarian
responds if that day comes. For now,
he's certainly smug and content to let the players he picked do the work for
him.
What's Next: A BYE
in Week Six.
Matt Vitaliano 2015-2016
Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
9.00 |
2.00 |
1.33 |
0.33 |
NA |
Rob Knapczyk: The more I watch Team Dark
Blue, the more they remind me of the Golden State Warriors. This same roster (more or less) won its first
championship last year and have come roaring out of the gates in their title
defense. In this analogy, Rob plays the
role of Leandro Barbosa,
Steve is Brandon Rush, Luke is Maurice Speights, and
Matt V is Luke Walton. However, the
ending to the Warrior's season (and Team Dark Blue's) has yet to be
written. Assumptions are a dangerous
thing.
What's Next: Rob
will come in his shorts after catching a glimpse of a lady jogger.
Rob Knapczyk 2015-2016
Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
25.67 |
8.33 |
4.33 |
0.00 |
73.68% |
Luke A: Decorative socks
aside, Luke played likely his best game of the season in Week Five, amassing 12
points, 5 boards, 4 assists, and 3 blocks.
His behind-the-scenes work has been a key to Dark Blue's fast start. When push comes to shove, Luke will fade back
into oblivion, but its nice to see his efforts show on
the stat line against the bottom feeders of the league.
What's Next: Luke
will switch to drinking Michelob beer and no one will ask why or care.
Luke A. 2015-2016 Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
8.50 |
7.75 |
3.25 |
1.00 |
25.00% |
Jerry Hahn: DNP. Out for season due to injury.
What's Next: Many
long months of painful introspection and rehabilitation.
Jerry Hahn 2015-2016 Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
NA |
NA |
NA |
NA |
NA |
Dave Troy: On BYE in Week
Five.
What's Next:
Dave
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
15.00 |
6.00 |
3.00 |
0.50 |
50.00% |
Mike Steigerwald: Week Five might have
exposed Team Blue in the sense that they will struggle against man-to-man
defenses. Blue did not play that well,
despite getting the win. Really, Team
Orange just couldn't produce enough points of their own. It leads me to the conclusion that Team Dark
Blue will be a big challenge for Steigerwald's Team
Blue. And I'm officially tired of all
the blue teams this season. It makes it
very difficult to keep track of and write about. From now on, the three blue teams will be
renamed Jizz, Cum, and
Spunk.
What's Next: Team Jizz returns to action in Week Seven after the BYE, against
Team Spunk.
Mike Steigerwald 2015-2016
Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
24.00 |
12.50 |
4.75 |
0.00 |
84.21% |
Steve Dudek: Steve got back on the horse in Week Five, scoring in double-digits for the third time this season. His elevated consistency on the court has been the real difference maker this year for Team Dark Blue. If he could match that level of consistency in his personal life, he wouldn't be the biggest loser I know.
What's Next: Steve
will get schooled by a nasty Bo crossover in Week Seven.
Steve Dudek 2015-2016 Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
15.00 |
7.50 |
4.25 |
0.25 |
43.75% |
Mike Davis: On BYE in Week Five.
What's Next: Team
Yellow against Team Light Blue in Week Six.
Mike
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
19.00 |
13.00 |
3.00 |
1.00 |
66.67% |
Paul Hobe: Paul looked a little fumbly out there in Week Five, having a difficult time holding on to the ball. Remember, Paul, "if you squeeze the orange, you get orange juice." But perhaps Paul's struggles can be explained by the heavy mosh pitting he did the night before at the Muse concert, which are infamous for having the most aggressive most pits around.
What's Next: Paul
will try to get his name in the score book next time around.
Paul Hobe 2015-2016 Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
5.50 |
6.75 |
0.75 |
0.25 |
50.00% |
Mark Vitaliano: Perhaps setting the
record for getting blocked the most times in a game, Mark's inside presence was
a key winning factor for his team in Week Five.
Mark attempts over 7 free-throws a game, which is a huge advantage for
any team. His steady play has been huge
for Team Blue during their current three-game win streak.
What's Next: After
a BYE, Mark V will look to keep things rolling in Week Seven against his uncle's
team.
Mark Vitaliano 2015-2016
Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
17.50 |
9.50 |
2.00 |
0.50 |
73.33% |
Eric Mittermann: On BYE in Week Five.
What's Next: Eric
will return to the court in Week Six to push his team's record to 0-4.
Eric Mittermann
2015-2016 Season Averages
|
|
RPG |
APG |
BPG |
FT% |
|
1.00 |
3.67 |
0.67 |
0.33 |
50.00% |
2015-2016 Standings
|
Team |
Captain |
Record |
Streak |
|
DarkBlue |
Matt V |
4-0 |
W4 |
|
Blue |
Tierney |
3-1 |
W3 |
|
Yellow |
Daniher |
2-1 |
L1 |
|
Grey |
Beave |
2-2 |
W1 |
|
LightBlue |
Vito |
2-2 |
L1 |
|
|
Brennan |
1-3 |
L1 |
|
Red |
Garmes |
1-3 |
L3 |
|
Green |
Bo |
0-3 |
L3 |